Concept of Bride and Bridegroom

A friend of mine asked me about the use of the Bride and Bridegroom in the Bible, and God showed me much more than I thought when I started to answer.

The metaphor of the Bride/Bridegroom runs from the very beginning of the Bible to the very end. It is set up in the Old Testament, and that's why there's very little explanation of it in the New Testament. The people writing the New Testament understood that metaphor very well. The primary use of the metaphor is God as the Bridegroom and Israel (God's chosen people) as the Bride. That metaphor shifts in the New Testament to Christ as the Bridegroom and the Church (Body of Christ/all people - Jews and Gentiles who have accepted Christ) as the Bride.

All of this rests on the concept of covenant - fundamental, absolutely fundamental to understanding our salvation and relationship to God.

A covenant is the most binding form of a contract. It can be between two people, two nations, or between God and man. God makes several covenants with Israel through specific people (Noah - won't flood the earth again; Abraham - you will be the father of many nations; Moses - the promised land; etc.) God makes an everlasting covenant with Israel and, in essence, ties himself to Israel forever - for better or worse. It would be similar to becoming blood brothers or getting married. You agree to become one in a way that cannot be broken.

One way a covenant was marked in the Old Testament was that three or four sacrificial animals were cut in two. The two halves of each animal were laid opposite from each other forming a path in the middle. The two people making the covenant would walk through the dead animals - as if walking into death and coming back changed/one. When God made the covenant with Abraham, God chose this way and himself walked through the animals.

Genesis 15 - God's Covenant With Abram

1 After this, the word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision:
"Do not be afraid, Abram.
I am your shield,
your very great reward."
2 But Abram said, "O Sovereign LORD, what can you give me since I remain childless and the one who will inherit my estate is Eliezer of Damascus?" 3 And Abram said, "You have given me no children; so a servant in my household will be my heir."
4 Then the word of the LORD came to him: "This man will not be your heir, but a son coming from your own body will be your heir." 5 He took him outside and said, "Look up at the heavens and count the stars—if indeed you can count them." Then he said to him, "So shall your offspring be."
6 Abram believed the LORD, and he credited it to him as righteousness.
7 He also said to him, "I am the LORD, who brought you out of Ur of the Chaldeans to give you this land to take possession of it."
8 But Abram said, "O Sovereign LORD, how can I know that I will gain possession of it?"
9 So the LORD said to him, "Bring me a heifer, a goat and a ram, each three years old, along with a dove and a young pigeon."
10 Abram brought all these to him, cut them in two and arranged the halves opposite each other; the birds, however, he did not cut in half. 11 Then birds of prey came down on the carcasses, but Abram drove them away.
12 As the sun was setting, Abram fell into a deep sleep, and a thick and dreadful darkness came over him. 13 Then the LORD said to him, "Know for certain that your descendants will be strangers in a country not their own, and they will be enslaved and mistreated four hundred years. 14 But I will punish the nation they serve as slaves, and afterward they will come out with great possessions. 15 You, however, will go to your fathers in peace and be buried at a good old age. 16 In the fourth generation your descendants will come back here, for the sin of the Amorites has not yet reached its full measure."
17 When the sun had set and darkness had fallen, a smoking firepot with a blazing torch appeared and passed between the pieces. 18 On that day the LORD made a covenant with Abram and said, "To your descendants I give this land, from the river of Egypt to the great river, the Euphrates- 19 the land of the Kenites, Kenizzites, Kadmonites, 20 Hittites, Perizzites, Rephaites, 21 Amorites, Canaanites, Girgashites and Jebusites."

After that, God and Israel were one - married, as God chooses to refer to His relationship with Israel throughout the rest of the Bible.

Isaiah 54

2 "Do not be afraid; you will not suffer shame.
Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.
You will forget the shame of your youth
and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.

5 For your Maker is your husband—
the LORD Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth.

6 The LORD will call you back
as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—
a wife who married young,
only to be rejected," says your God.

7 "For a brief moment I abandoned you,
but with deep compassion I will bring you back.

8 In a surge of anger
I hid my face from you for a moment,
but with everlasting kindness
I will have compassion on you,"

says the LORD your Redeemer.

Isaiah 62

4 No longer will they call you Deserted,
or name your land Desolate.
But you will be called Hephzibah (My Delight is in You),
and your land Beulah (Married).

5 As a young man marries a maiden,
so will your sons marry you;
as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride,
so will your God rejoice over you.

In Hebrew culture, a "redeemer" was a man who agreed to take a woman in as a wife and provide her food and shelter. When a woman's husband died, usually his next of kin would be her redeemer. (This is why Boaz redeemed Ruth.) This is key to understanding the concept of "redemption" in the New Testament and for understanding Jesus as our Redeemer, often called our "Kinsman Redeemer." More of the marriage metaphor.

In the Old Testament, Israel behaves like an unfaithful wife, choosing other gods/husbands/providers before God, time and time again. But God is the faithful husband that never gives up on Israel. As the Old Testament (a better translation would be the Old Covenant) draws to a close, it is clear that Israel cannot/will not keep the covenant as it stands. Israel does not keep the law, does not love God, and is perpetually in sin. So God institutes a New Covenant that will allow Israel (or God's children) to return to Him as a faithful wife in good-standing.

In the Old Testament/Covenant, Israel could only be cleansed of sin through the system of sacrifices at the Temple. As a nation, on one day of the year only, the High Priest could enter the Holy of Holies (where God's presence was) and offer a blood sacrifice (animal) for Israel's sins. (This is what Zacharias was doing when God told him that he would have a son, John the Baptist). This Day of Atonement is still celebrated by the Jews as Yom Kippur.

In the New Covenant, God fulfilled the temple sacrifice once and for all. Instead of an animal sacrifice by the High Priest, Jesus was the High Priest and He sacrificed Himself - a final and everlasting forgiveness of sin by a High Priest that was one in the same with God. When He was crucified, the curtain in the temple, that separated the Holy of Holies from the rest of the temple (and everyone but the High Priest) and from God, split in two. As Christ's body was symbolically split in two (or was torn during the crucifixion, represented physically by the curtain splitting), the veil between us and God split in two. Like in the Old Covenant concept, we walk through the divided pieces of the torn curtain, of the sacrificed body - we must come "through Christ" to God. When we do this, we are entering into an eternal covenant with God - we become the everlasting Bridge to the eternal Bridegroom.

In communion, we drink the cup that Christ says is filled with His blood, the blood of the new covenant. That ought to blow your mind next time you take Communion - a "remembrance (do this in remembrance of me)" of the our covenant with God!

I Corinthians 11

23 For I received from the Lord what I also passed on to you: The Lord Jesus, on the night he was betrayed, took bread, 24 and when he had given thanks, he broke it and said, "This is my body, which is [broken] for you; do this in remembrance of me." 25 In the same way, after supper he took the cup, saying, "This cup is the blood of the new covenant; do this, whenever you drink it, in remembrance of me." 26 For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord's death until he comes.

The idea of coming to God "through Christ" also explains why Jesus is the only way to God (John 14:6 "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.") As I understand this, it explains why other religions can accurately describe aspects of God, aspects of morality, even aspects of salvation, but none of them provide the means to salvation/redemption/covenant in the way that God has laid out as His way in the Old Testament.

One of the things I'm learning right now (being blown away by) is how absolutely crucial the Old Testament is for the New Testament to make any sense. In some ways, the New Testament is like a text message - filled with shorthand and symbols that the reader is supposed to understand. However, I've found that in the American church we've almost come to believe the shorthand is the longhand and we've forgotten, or never learned, the foundation that will make our faith make sense. There is much we will never understand and will remain mystery. However, God revealed Himself, particularly His plan for our salvation, in a way that we can comprehend, that works for our rational brains. I think because we know so little of the Old Testament that the New Testament doesn't always make sense, and we've begun to take pride in a "blind faith" when God is asking us to open our eyes to His Word.

...

My friend particularly asked about the reference in Mark 2:19.

19 Jesus answered, "How can the guests of the bridegroom fast while he is with them? They cannot, so long as they have him with them." 20 But the time will come when the bridegroom will be taken from them, and on that day they will fast.

In this passage of Mark, Jesus is really answering legal questions about what people can and can't do when. In these verses, Jesus is responding to someone's question about why the Pharisees and their disciples are fasting (as, according to Jewish law, they should be) but Jesus' disciples aren't fasting. His answer is interesting because in it He alludes to who He is and that He will die. They most likely don't pick up on that because this early in Mark, Jesus has not identified Himself. He is, in effect, saying to the Jews that their laws and practices are all observed as they wait for Messiah but that Messiah is here.

It is interesting that in the first chapter of Mark, the demons do recognize who Jesus is.

21 They went to Capernaum, and when the Sabbath came, Jesus went into the synagogue and began to teach. 22 The people were amazed at his teaching, because he taught them as one who had authority, not as the teachers of the law. 23 Just then a man in their synagogue who was possessed by an evil spirit cried out, 24"What do you want with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are—the Holy One of God!"

Pruning

I had a pruning experience last week that was very illustrative. I was actually pruning back our bushes and overgrowth with some very basic pruning shears. I started off nipping the smaller branches and working down to the roots (of the bushes that were aliens). That was taking a long time and leaving a lot to clean up. I wised up, got down on my knees, crawled in the bush, found the root, and cut it. Amazingly, the whole thing was done in an instant, and it was much easier to drag the bush in toto to the street than all the pieces littering the driveway. All that is to say I realizes when pruning spiritually, hurry up and get to the root!!!

I don't know how this fits into the illustration, but our nephew was pruning the bushes at my old house yesterday. He had a gas powered trimmer. Wow! That's even faster. I'm sure there's something to having the right tools spiritually as well.

"I Never Knew You" (Matt. 7:23)

Our scripture lesson yesterday included Matthew 7:23.

21 "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father who is in heaven will enter."
22 "Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name cast out demons, and in Your name perform many miracles?'
23 "And then I will declare to them, 'I never knew you.'" ...

What struck me about the passage was the reason Jesus gave for turning people away from heaven. If you had only read up to verse 22 and then asked me to fill in what I thought would be Jesus' response, why He would have rejected people, my first few guesses would have been something along the lines of "You're a sinner," "You weren't good enough," "You didn't do something well enough in you faith/religion," "You chose the wrong theology," or "You didn't accomplish enough in your life." I'm not sure I would have ever come up with "I never knew you."

The interesting thing is that I might have come up with "You never knew Me." There are many people who don't bother to get to know Christ and plenty who have never had the chance. That's the whole premise of evangelism and discipleship. That's the part at which we know, very well, that we can fail and often spend the majority of our time trying to accomplish.

But Jesus said, "I never knew you." The subject and the object have been switched.

My first response to this statement is "What do you mean You never knew me?!?! You know everything, and You created me!" Psalm 139 (You have searched me and You have known me ...) comes immediately to mind as an apt starting point for my defense. And, of course, Jesus does know us, but His response indicates that there must be another element to this knowing which is variable, and, in some way, depends on us.

Let's consider the verb "to know." The original text is in Greek, and I don't know which word was translated as know. However, I think there is still much to be learned starting with the English.

Some options for defining "to know":

1. Having a mental catalog of facts about something or someone. Perhaps more at "to know of" or "to know about."

E.g. I know Chris Caldwell. He is a 42-year old male, who graduated from UGA, and is the Budget Administrator for Athens-Clarke County. He is married to Julie Caldwell and lives in Athens, GA.
E.g. I know English.
E.g. I know Lexington, VA.

In each of these cases, I know a list of facts about someone or something, but my knowledge does not depend on any consent from or relationship with what/who I know.

2. Having an emotional, psychological, or spiritual understanding of someone or something.

E.g. I know you work with Chris, but you don't really know him like I do.

In this use of know, there is a sense of something deeper - a knowledge beyond a list of facts. The primary difference in this usage from the first, for the purpose of applying the scripture, is that this kind of knowledge depends on a relationship. There must be some willingness of the person being known to allow another to know him or her. This kind of knowledge cannot be acquired apart from communication with and connection to the person being known.

3. Having a sexual relationship with another.

E.g. Adam knew Eve, and they conceived a son.

We are all probably most familiar with this euphemism for sex from Bible references. In applying this definition (and deepest level of the verb "to know"), the crucial element is not the sexual act but union for the purpose of procreation, for fulfilling God's first command to man: "Be fruitful and multiply."

Having thought through these three possible English nuances/definitions of "to know", let's revisit the implications of Jesus' response "I never knew you" and how we may have a role in this.

I believe that for our purposes, definition 1 does not apply. This in not what Jesus is talking about.

Definition 2, however, begins to shed some light on our role. Here we must acknowledge the concept of free will. Perhaps one of the most discussed topics in theology, I bring it up only to establish a premise for our having some say in our relationship with Christ. For whatever reason, God gave us free will, and from that free will we have been given the extremely powerful capacity of choice (or perhaps we mistakenly grabbed it in the Garden of Eden). I have often heard it said that God didn't want a bunch of automatons. What pleasure would there have been receiving obedience from a people who had no capacity to do otherwise. God, instead, desired obediance born out of choice, and that choice is governed by love.

The question I ask myself and you is this: Have you allowed yourself to be known, really known, by God? Or do you maintain a professional relationship with God - cordial, polite, and appropriate, but safe?

Being known, really known, is the basis for loving and being loved.

The second question is this: Do you realize that one of God's moves in this relationship dance was the most vulnerable move He could make? He got down on our level and made a complete fool of Himself in the world's eyes to communicate His love for us to us?

I'm not sure there could be a more vulnerable move. How do you respond to that? What's your next move?

I admit, mine has often been to politely move past the jarring (not-so-socially acceptable) display and quickly try to reestablish something more normal and comfortable - something more churchy and safe. It strikes me now that my response feels to Jesus the same way it would have felt to me had I told Chris (my husband) that I loved him and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, and then he had paused briefly over his menu at Chili's and followed up with, "So have you decided what you are going to order?"

Ouch.

To get through the second definition of know, I think we have to respond in kind to God's last move - a resounding, completely undignified, and all-encompassing YES! A barbaric yawp for God, if you will. (Cf. Dead Poet's Society, if I lost you.)

(I do want to say that this is more than uttering the sinner's prayer and/or shouting some excited words. It is an affirmation, a commitment, from the deepest level of your soul. The very strange trick of all this is that the ability to actually say YES!!! is a gift from God - not something we can muster. God has to allow our eyes to be opened in such a way that we can see Him, and then know Him, and finally love Him. A bit circular, I agree. The lesson for me is that I have had to ask Jesus to allow me to see Him so that I could genuinely love Him. If you struggle with the Jesus factor, pray for this: Open the eyes of me heart, Lord. I want to see You.)

Once we have done this, the third definition can come into play.

One of the greatest joys of God's plan for humanity is that He desires to allow us to be part of His work - to love on His behalf, to create on His behalf, to forgive on His behalf, to heal on His behalf, to correct on His behalf, to teach on His behalf, etc.

For this to happen, however, we must be known by God in the third and deepest sense. (I reiterate that the focus here is the union for the purpose of procreation.) We must give ourselves entirely to Him for the purpose of being fruitful - of bearing His fruit. We can only bear fruit that He plants/originates. As he reminds us in John 15:

1"I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes[ so that it will be even more fruitful. 3You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. 4Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. 5"I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6If anyone does not remain in me, he is like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. 8This is to my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.

So the third question I ask is: Are you bearing fruit for/with God? Have you allowed Him to use you for His vessel spiritually in the same way He designed man and woman to procreate physically? Is He bearing a "family" through you?

The marriage metaphor of God's relationship to man runs throughout the Bible (if this is making you a little uncomfortable). Christ is referred to as the Bridegroom and the church as the Bride. However, it may be surprising the the term "redemption" is also a marriage term.

The word redeemed in its original Hebrew (Qal or Ga'al) was a term that could be applied to marriage. It did not start off as a theological term, though it is very hard to hear "redemption" or "redeeming love" in any other way now. However, to get a true sense of what these terms mean to us today, we first have to understand the original meaning/connotation. That understanding sheds light on why God chose that word (redeem) to explain His relationship to us. We get a better sense of what He was trying to communicate.

Qal (Heb.) - to redeem, act as kinsman-redeemer, avenge, revenge, ransom, do the part of a kinsman

1. to act as kinsman, do the part of next of kin, act as kinsman-redeemer 1a
2. by marrying brother's widow to beget a child for him, to redeem from slavery, to redeem land, to exact vengeance

In Isaiah 54, God says this:

5 For your Maker is your husband—
the LORD Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
he is called the God of all the earth.

6 The LORD will call you back
as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—
a wife who married young,
only to be rejected," says your God.

7 "For a brief moment I abandoned you,
but with deep compassion I will bring you back.

8 In a surge of anger
I hid my face from you for a moment,
but with everlasting kindness
I will have compassion on you,"
says the LORD your Redeemer.

So, what of all this "God is my husband and redeemer" talk? How am I supposed to feel about that?

I think it is easy to get stuck on definition 2 to understand God has your husband. You can ascribe warm, fuzzy, pseudo-romantic feelings to God, have some intimate devotion time with Him, get some spiritual tingles, and then go on about your life.

To continue the metaphor, that sounds more like dating God, and He's talking about marriage.

No, I think we have to focus on definition 3. If God is my husband, it has to go a lot deeper than a feeling. First of all, it is a distinct change in lifestyle (as is marriage between a man and a woman). Second, and more importantly, it will produce something new.

God says that we will bear fruit. What does that mean? What does fruit look like?

Going back to the procreation metaphor, we can learn what the fruit might and might not look like.

A child is not a clone of his or her parents. The beauty of a life is that it is its own unique being created for its own purpose. A child is not the surrogate of the parents. A child is not someone through whom parents to relive their own childhood. A child is not someone for a parent to use to experience a better childhood or correct his or her own. A child is not someone for a parent to lean on for identity or pride.

A child is, in stead, a sacred trust.

I think the fruit we bear is much the same. It is easy to want our fruit to be just like us - just like what we had in mind - a repeat of our previous experience or a fulfillment of our (or others') expectations. It is easy for use to want to use our fruit to build up our self-esteem or for our own pleasure and comfort. We have been indoctrinated into the American Dream that teaches us that hard word will lead to financial success, independence, freedom to do what we want with our time, and a life of creature comforts.

The motto is "I build my own dreams. I am the author of my destiny."

And we are completely free to mold our fruit out of clay, paint it, glaze it, fire it, and stick it in a bowl on the sideboard. No doubt, we'll have a beautiful display of fruit.

But ... two things ...

1. It won't be alive.
2. It won't have any seeds.

The other option is to allow God, the Vinedresser, to grow real fruit within us. The fruit God produces through is alive, and it lives apart from us. Moreover, it reproduces apart from us because it is sustained by God - not us.

It's out of our control, but it is under our influence.

Are you willing to let God produce this kind of fruit in you? Are you willing to give Him that much control or, rather, to give up that much control?

Are you willing to produce produce or just something that will be a pretty decoration and fool a child?

Our fruit is and does the work of God. In right relationship, we tend it on God's behalf, not ours. Our influence is applied toward the purpose and glory of God, not towards the purpose and glory of us.

Are you living - on God's behalf or yours?
Are you loving your spouse - on God's behalf or yours?
Are you loving your children - on God's behalf or yours?
Are you using your talents - on God's behalf or yours?
Are you using your finances - on God's behalf or yours?
Are you using your time - on God's behalf or yours?

All of these are part of a sacred trust given to us because God had faith in our ability to tend them. They did not originate with us, but they can be derailed by us. Our options are to be a faithful trustee or to try and steal what rightly belongs to God. (The Bible is littered with attempted robbery.) The ultimate theivery is an attempt on God's authority and sovereignty. Strangely, we all have the capacity within our own lives to hijack that from God - to our detriment, but our opportunity nonetheless - and put ourselves, in all our glorious widsom, on the throne of our lives. We can then proceed to make exceeding little out of the great potential abundance God has planted in us.

I suppose it all comes down to trust. That is no more simply illustrated than in marriage. Complete trust in each other is the only balance that allows a whole greater than the sum of the parts. The same is true in our relationship with God. Without trust we have no access to His contribution. We can just put our attempt right next to His, and never the two shall meet. But imagine the whole whose sum includes one part which is God? Can you even begin to fathom your being the other part? And you are.

God's desire is first to know about you. Then He wants to know you enough to really love you. But the greatest thing of all is that His deepest desire is to call you His Beloved.

That, my brothers and sisters, was God's proposition on the cross.

Remember, Jesus asked Peter three times, "Do you love me?" And each time he used a deeper word (in Greek) for love.

Maybe we, in turn, need to ask Jesus, "Do you know me?" "Do you know me?" "Do you know me?"

Jack, the Turd, and Salvation

Yesterday, our cat, Jack, somehow managed to get a few turds and a little diarrhea caught (and dried) in the long fur on the backs of his hind legs. It smelled awful!! As soon as I discovered the source, I immediately put him out, assuming that, as a cat, he would take care of this egregious grooming faux pas. I left Chris a message telling him that if he came home for lunch NOT to let Jack in.

When I got home that evening, I checked Jack, and there was no change. As I anthropomorphised Jack, I thought he was just being obstinate and lazy, so I let him spend the night out. I was trying to avoid the messy and difficult process of cleaning him up myself.

When I got up this morning, there was still no change.

Now I have to explain something about Jack. He's not a normal cat. He's a Maine Coon, and he's the most sociable cuddlebug ever. He's much more like a puppy than a cat. He loves people. He loves to be around Chris and me. He's never more than a few feet away. He loves to be held, pet, and snuggled. Very strange for a cat - fairly normal for his breed, though.

So as I sat down this morning in my chair beside the sliding glass door to do my morning devotion and drink my coffee, there was poor Jack. He was howling and distraught standing on the other side of the door. He was pawing incessantly at the glass, and I kept telling him he couldn't come in because he stunk. (I had moved his food to the garage.)

Finally, I felt so sorry for him, I went, got some scissors, and decided to give cleaning him up a try. I put him in my lap (on the patio), flipped him over, and went to work. I'll skip the details, but in the end I was pretty successful.

I opened the door and let Jack in, thinking that was all he wanted. But he couldn't get settled. He moved from place to place, kept meowing, and followed me into the kitchen. He just looked up at me and meowed. It was then that I realized what he wanted was to be held. We hadn't even touched the poor thing in two days!

So, I scooped him up in my arms, flipped him over on his back, and loved on him. I found myself explaining to him that we still loved HIM - it was just the turd that was the problem.

Then God turned the light on :)

I realized Jack couldn't see the turds and had probably gotten used to the smell, if it ever bothered him in the first place. He had no idea what the problem was, and even if I could explain it, he didn't know how to get rid of the turds. He needed someone else to help him
- to do it for him.

How like us with our own sin?!

We don't see it, and we don't understand why God won't let us in the holy place. We assume it's something inherently wrong with us - not the turd stuck to our back ;) And God, in His infinite kindness, realized that and cut off our turds for us. He washed us white as snow and let us again be a pleasing fragrance. He let us back in his house (forever), picked us up in His arms, and told us that He loves us with an everlasting love!

... I'm really glad we got a cat.